So I may not be on here for a bit.

Tomorrow morning I may or may not be going to Piedras Negras, Mexico with a few members from my church. We're going to drop off an crapload of stuff at this orphanage. It's all sad sad story stuff. You know, guy starts orphanage in poor place, they live off donations, kids just being left at the door step all the time, guy who started it gets cancer, guy might die, you know, usual sad and bad. I've gotten SO MUCH from so many people. I've filled my Jeep twice. It's awesome. But I don't know. I'm having mixed feelings right now...

I had helped my younger cousin with her homework earlier today and then I went to work. After work I picked up her workbook to check her answers since she has a test over that stuff tomorrow. Most of her answers were wrong. But it was too late. She was already asleep by the time I got the book back to her. She'll probably fail this quiz.
It was then that I got my urge again. I screamed profanities in my Jeep as I drove to her house knowing full well that it was just too late. I began to flashback again...
"You can't fix the whole world, Aldo" she said as she held me.
I didn't care back then. And I felt that feeling again of not caring. Maybe I couldn't but I would sure as hell try!

God, I hate it. She still haunts me. I'm composed as far as everyone knows or thinks. But then I get to these moments and she's there. The moments that are the most important. The moments I try to find my passion, my love, my heart. maybe it's because she's there. I can't find those things without her. I still love her and probably always will. I just wish I could have my passion and love back without her. I guess when I gave her my heart I kept none of it for me...

So wish me well on this trip. I may be without heart and half dead at times but this will not stop me. I will NOT be held down dammit! I will fight!


"Victory through inner strength, persistence, and love!"

awesome quote!`
Yes well you cannot save the world nor the people in it but you want to leave it knowing that you did what you could to make the people in it, SMILE... (I am smiling) You are doing a GREAT thing!!! Good luck and safe trip!
» kKaMa67 on 2006-12-15 01:49:53

You're spectacular.
» sarah on 2006-12-15 05:58:24

you have no idea sarah.
» Helena on 2006-12-15 07:31:45

good luck and god speed.
i wish you the best in ever endeavor.
you're a good freakin' dude. haha
» ThisCharmingMan on 2006-12-15 12:22:25

haha. yeah, it is.. i love messing with him... because i'm lame and have no life.
» ThisCharmingMan on 2006-12-18 01:49:46

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